Friday, May 11, 2007


Q: How do i not poop on my partner after anal sex?

A: Have sex in the bathroom, and make a Mcgyver-esque roll to the potty when you're finished.

Seriously though, this can be an issue. And it's my first question.

So. Here's the scoop (and I'll leave the obvious pun out)

There are several ways to approach the problem, but most of them are preemptive. First, you have to be okay with anal sex. And by okay, it should be something that you talk about with your partner BEFORE you get to the moment. Cause once you're there, There's no garantee that there won't be a present waiting at the end.

Before I go any farther, repeat after me: "USE A CONDOM USE A CONDOM USE A CONDOM"

It will protect the penile hole (praeputial sphincter, for those of you who what the fancy Latin name) from being left with a present. Plus, Anal sex can cause an STD to be transmitted faster than you can say, " Oh, yeah, I have and STD". And a good silicone-based lube. TONS of it.

1.Most people will tell you to try and enema before anal sex. That is totally your choice. an enema is like a shower for your colon, so if your a shower person, go ahead. If your more of a bath person, you can skip it.

2. try to finish eating 6 hours before launch. That way, your digestive tract can head everything out with ample time left over.

3. When finished, just know that it will take some time for you anus to shrink back to its regular size. Have clean up handy. A towel, an ex lover's t-shirt. Whatever.

4. Casually roll over and hightail it to the bathroom for deposit time. Make it fun. Think of a saucy line to throw out as you clench and run.

And that concludes our Anal Ettiquete session for today. Tune in to see what comes out next!